


Silence Part II

by orphan_account



Series: Silence [2]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-03
Updated: 2014-05-06
Packaged: 2018-01-21 18:49:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1560443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“There will come a moment when you will have to commit to this or bail. Every field agent has a defining moment.”<br/>How Skye deals with her accident and killing someone for the first time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“I’ve sedated both of them in the meantime. They’re suffering from mild hypothermia.”

 

“Any other injuries?” Coulson asked the nurse as his team stood anxiously around him.

 

“Mr Robeson has several internal injuries and his leg wound has a slight infection. We’ll have to monitor him for a few weeks.”

 

“And Skye?” Ward asked impatiently. _Who cared about the technician anyway?_

 

“The muscles in her shoulder are damaged from being dislocated for so long however with some PT she should heal. We found some bruising on her abdomen and have taken her in for scans to check for internal bleeding. I’ll check on her now. Excuse me.”

 

She left them to sit in a hospital waiting room. Much like they had when she was shot. At least the outlook was better this time. Though they had no idea what mental impacts her experience would have on her.

 

Ward remembered the first time he killed someone. At least he hadn’t fallen out of the sky beforehand.

 

He felt a hand land on his shoulder and he had to refrain the urge to flinch. Since when could people sneak up on him?

 

“Ward.” Coulson’s voice was amazingly calm. “May and I are going back to the plane. The weather’s cleared and we’re going to meet up with the search and rescue teams to recover the bodies.”

 

He opened his mouth to offer to come.

 

“I want you to stay here and watch Fitzsimmons. I think they’re pretty shook up at the moment. Make sure they get some rest and keep me monitored if you hear _anything_ about Skye.”

 

“Understood.” Usually he would have complained that he’d been saddled with babysitting. Today he was just thankful he didn’t have to leave Skye’s side. He couldn’t leave her again.

 

**********

 

Phil hadn’t realised he’d been staring out into space until he sensed May come in behind him.

 

“Course is locked. We’ll be there in twenty minutes.”

 

“I’ll join you in the cockpit in a moment.”

 

He felt her pause in the doorway.

 

“You know she’ll be alright.”

 

“I don’t know how she’s going to cope with this.” It was true. She’d been put in a situation most S.H.I.E.L.D agents wouldn’t have to deal with until they were at least level 3. Skye wasn’t even an official agent yet.

 

“She will. She’s proven herself more than once before.”

 

“I’m just worried this will be the thing that breaks her.”


	2. Chapter 2

Simmons had her head on Leo’s lap. She dozed in and out of sleep as he held her hand. She’d almost slept then until she remembered the sight of Skye walking onto the bus behind Ward coated in cuts and dried blood with the deadest look in her eye.

With a sigh she sat up, not letting go of Fitz, and resigned herself to the fact she wouldn’t be sleeping anytime soon. Not until she knew Skye was alright.

Looking at Fitz she saw him looking at her with the most curious expression. She had just been ready to ask him what was wrong when the doctor walked in.

 

**********

 

Ward was there first with Fitzsimmons scurrying behind him.

“Is she awake?”

“Yes.” The doctor’s voice was hesitant.

“Is she stable?” Simmons asked her mouth set in a hard line.

“She had a bleed in her kidney but we repaired it with minimal surgery. There were a few deep cuts we had to stitch. However she seems to be having a delayed reaction to her accident.”

“How?” Simmons asked as Ward asked “Can I see her?”

“The trauma seems to have put her in a …state.”

The doctor started leading them down the hall.

“We think it might be reactive psychosis but we’ll have to wait for a psych consult.”

“Has she said anything?” Fitz said.

“No. We’ve had to restrain her. She becomes defensive when our staff try to touch her. Hopefully after some rest she may improve but she’s resisting treatment at the moment.”

Skye was staring up at the ceiling her wrists pinned to her sides.

Simmons and Fitz paused at the door but Ward rushed straight in and grabbed her face and turned her to look at him.

“Skye?”

She looked right through him.


	3. Chapter 3

After two days they were given permission to move her back onto the bus. They took shifts staying with her. Surprisingly May insisted on taking the first shift and sent them all to bed. She had to threaten Ward with a taser to get him to actually leave.

When she was confident no one could see her she pulled the chair as close to Skye’s bed as possible and stroked the girl’s hair. She didn’t say anything, she knew there was no point.

 

**********

 

The next morning Jemma relived May saying that she needed to run some tests anyway.

“Now Skye I’m just going to check on some of your stitches.” She said gently and lifted her gown to look at the surgical incisions.

“Wonderful. No infection and the tests show that your kidneys are functioning perfectly so we’ll be able to take you off this drip now. That’s good isn’t it?” She asked. She tried to talk to her calmly. She hoped she would eventually respond. But then she’d look into her far away eyes and that hope would die a little more.

 

**********

 

Fitz was the first one to crack.

“You need to say something.”

-

“Right now Skye I’m serious.”

-

“Damn it Skye snap out of it.” He yelled his face right next to hers. She didn’t flinch but she did turn slightly and he felt a pang of guilt as he realised a bit of his saliva had landed on her forehead. He gently wiped it away.

“Leo.” He heard Jemma say softly from behind him. “That won’t work. She just needs time to recover. She’s been through so much.”

“I know. I just – miss her.” He laughed harshly. “Miss her.” He put his hand on her arm. “She’s right here. I can touch her. But she’s not here.”

“I know.” Jemma wrapped an arm around his shoulder. “But we just have to trust that she’ll come back to us soon.”

“That’s what scares me Jems. What is she going to be like when she comes back?”

 

**********

 

“Hey kiddo” Coulson said and gently shut the door behind him. “I went into your bunk and found what you were reading last. Thought you might like it if I read some more to you now.”

He laughed once again as he looked at the title. Hansel and Gretel. He remembered her joking about it a couple of weeks ago.

_“So? Think of it as aiding my orientation skills. Not getting lost 101.”_

She was lost now.

He’d seen Fitz’s outburst yesterday. He’d caught Simmons crying in a closet a few hours later. He’d found May awake at night more often than usual. He’s discovered Ward watching the live feed to Skye’s room more than once.

It was times like these when they all seemed to realise how important they’d all become to one another. Because if you take one away everybody feels it.

He knew Fitz wanted to push Skye to wake up. But then again Fitz had never killed somebody.

With a sigh Coulson found the page Skye had last turned down and started to read hoping that the words would help her find her way home.


	4. Chapter 4

Every time he had a chance Ward would sneak into Skye’s room. Even the times Coulson had given him direct orders not to and to get some sleep.

She was sleeping now. But not peacefully. Her dreams were the only times he ever heard her speak anymore.

It had been five days now.

“One person unaccounted for.” Followed by a little whimper.

He wove their fingers together and leaned forward to run a hand through her hair.

“Shh. It’s okay Skye. I’m here. You’re safe.”

“Shut up.”

For a moment there he thought she was actually talking to him and his heart sunk a little when she sighed again and her head rolled to one side.

“No you’re not.”

She was talking to Agent Scott again. The agent who had to be carried back in pieces.

“You sound like my S.O.”

He hated how happy that made him.

She quietened down after a while and he soon fell asleep with his head resting on her hand. When he felt movement he expected it to be Jemma waking him up yet again telling him to go rest or Coulson yelling at him for disobeying his direct orders.

What he didn’t expect was to find Skye sitting up and rubbing her eyes.

“Skye?”

She didn’t say anything but she did look at him. Properly look at him. Like she used to. Like she could see right into his mind.

“Skye you’re up.” He looked around wanting to call for Jemma but not wanting to leave her and risk her going comatose again.

“Hmm.” It wasn’t really a word but she was acknowledging him at least.

She flexed her fingers in front of her and then got out of bed.

He rushed round and grabbed hold of her arm. “What are you doing you’re supposed to be resting.”

“Why?” Her voice sounded hoarse.

“I – well…” He didn’t actually know. It just felt strange to him that she should suddenly be getting up and walking off. “You have some wounds still, Simmons will need to check you out.”

“Okay.” She didn’t sit back down but she didn’t walk anywhere else.

Walking backwards he went to the doorway and bellowed “Simmons!” before walking back in and staring at Skye some more who was now absently scratching her elbow and looking around her like she was seeing the room for the first time and hadn’t in fact been in there for the last five days.

“What is it?” Jemma cried running in with Fitz on her heels.

“Skye?” Fitz said as he caught sight of her.

Again she didn’t say anything she just looked at him.

Simmons didn’t say anything she just ran forward and hugged her with Fitz shortly behind her. Skye patted them both on the backs but as Ward watched them he couldn’t help but compare it to when she’d just recovered from getting shot. When she hugged the twins, as she occasionally called them, she held them so tightly and her face glowed. Now she looked blank. Like she’d rather be anywhere else.

After that Jemma forced Skye back into bed and ran some tests while Coulson and May came in to also see the progress themselves.

Coulson looked relieved. May looked undecided.

“Can I go get a shower?” Skye asked. It was the most words she’d said in one go.

“Err…” Coulson started and looked at Jemma. Simmons nodded. “Sure.”

Skye gave a smile that didn’t quite look right and left the room leaving them all looking at each other with mixed expressions of joy and trepidation.


	5. Chapter 5

When Ward first started training her he’d said one thing that had always stuck with her.

“ _There will come a moment when you will have to commit to this or bail. Every field agent has a defining moment._ ”

Skye stepped under the jet of water and tried to let it wash her clean. Simmons washed her a few days ago, she had a vague memory of it, but she still felt dirty. Something told her a simple shower wasn’t going to get rid of that feeling any time soon.

She didn’t stay in long. Coulson had asked her to go back to his office when she was done. He wanted to know what happened on the plane. She’d have to be quick.

Quickly running a towel through her hair she sprinted back to her bunk.

 

**********

 

Coulson heard a soft tap on the door and looked up to see Skye. He beckoned her inside.

“It’s good to see you. Why don’t you sit down?”

She did.

“Is Paul okay?”

“Agent Robeson?”

She nodded.

“He’s still in hospital but I hear he’s expected to make a full recovery.”

“Good.”

“He’s been able to tell us most of the things that happened after you found him, how you saved his life. But we’ll still need your account too. For the records.”

“Of course.”

“You can either tell me and I’ll record it or if you want you can make a written statement?”

“I’ll write it down.”

He was a little disappointed. He wanted to hear her talk more. She hadn’t cracked a smile since she’d set off on the mission. Unless you count the fake one in the medpod.

“You’ll need to be thorough.”

“I know. Ward already taught me how to write mission statements. Shall I bring it to you when I’m done?”

“That’s fine, take your time.”

“Great.” She stood up to leave.

“And Skye…if you need to talk about this at all…”

“I know. Thanks.” She left.


	6. Chapter 6

“Skye?” Ward tapped on her door. She’d walked past all of them as they sat in the lounge waiting for her thirty minutes ago. While everyone else still sat waiting Ward had been unable to keep the distance between them. She was his rookie, his responsibility. He had to know how she was doing.

When she didn’t answer he pushed the door aside and slipped in closing it behind him. He hadn’t expected to see her with her bag fully packed zipping up her jacket.

“Skye?”

“We’re in Portland right?”

“What are you doing?”

“I’m going back to LA.”

“Why?”

“This is my account of what happened.” She said holding up an envelope. “Will you give it to Coulson for me?” She put it back on the bed when his hands didn’t move to take it.

“Skye. You can’t go. Have you told Coulson?”

“Look it’s not like I’m a proper agent I’m just an asset I can go whenever I want it’s what my contract stated. Don’t worry it’s not like I’m going to start hacking into S.H.I.E.L.D again.” She picked up her bag and slung it over her shoulder.

“Skye, you just need some time…” She couldn’t leave him. Not now. He reached a hand out to her unsure what to do. She swiftly moved past him and walked into the lounge.

“Skye?” He heard Simmons say. “Where are you going?”

He followed her out. She was heading for the cargo bay.

“I’m going back to LA.”

“Skye.” Coulson was coming down the stairs. “You can’t leave.”

They all followed her.

“Skye please.” Jemma said running to the front of them all. “You need to rest. You’ve been through so much you can’t just leave.”

“I’m sorry I need to go.” She didn’t look at them as she said it.

“Skye I’m not giving you authorisation to leave. Even if you want to leave S.H.I.E.L.D you still need to be debriefed.”

“There’s a facility in LA I’ll go there. Need to get my van back anyway…”

The thought of her living alone in that thing twisted his stomach.

“What are you even going to do walk there?” Fitz said in a vain effort to keep her aboard.

“I’ll take her.” May said clearly from the back of the room.

Everyone wheeled around to look at her in horror.

“Just let me grab my bag and we’ll go now.” She continued calmly and walked off.

Ward took Skye’s momentary surprise to his advantage and turned back on her.

“Skye you can’t leave us. The team needs you.”

“You don’t need anyone Agent Ward. You’re a specialist remember. You work alone.” It wasn’t even an insult. It was a statement. Is that what she really thought of him? “You’ve all managed perfectly fine without me in the past you can manage now.”

May walked back in. She must keep a bag ready at all times. Like he did.

“Let’s go.”

“Agent May.” Coulson spoke this time.

“The team needs to remain here to coordinate with the local S.H.I.E.L.D team to find out what happened on the plane. I’ll be back before we need to leave.”

Ward wasn’t sure but he thought he saw a significant look exchange between May and Coulson. There must have been something because Coulson backed off.

“You take her straight to the facility for debriefing and keep me updated.”

May nodded and got in the SUV taking Skye’s bag in the process.

“Skye…” Jemma pleaded one last time.

She looked at him fleetingly before getting in the car.


	7. Chapter 7

Skye didn’t know what to say. Normally she would try and bridge the silence. Normally she wouldn’t be running away.

She was particularly surprised when she saw them heading to a different part of the airport.

“Are we flying there?”

“I’m not going anywhere.” May said calmly and grabbed her bag pulling out a brown envelope from within. “Take this.”

She did but didn’t move to look at it.

May sighed. “Open it Skye.”

When she did she was shocked to see a bundle of cash and a passport.

“You’re name is Sarah Lawrence…on the passport anyway.”

Skye shook her head. “Why are you doing this? You’re meant to be taking me to debriefing.”

“I don’t talk about the people I killed. _Ever_.” The look in her eyes made Skye sure that she’d never want to hear about it even if May ever changed her mind about that. “But the first time I killed – on orders – I wanted to quit.”

“There were no orders…”

“I know. But you had to. You were put in the position by S.H.I.E.L.D and you feel that if you stay with them you’re going to get put in that position again. But Skye…you saved someone’s life. And I know at the moment that doesn’t feel like enough but with some perspective you’ll come to realise that what you did was not only necessary but _brave_. There are not a lot of people who could have done what you did and kept it together.”

“I didn’t keep it together.” Skye was secretly ashamed at her breakdown. She hated being so vulnerable in front of people. She didn’t like people to see her with her guard down.

“You did better than most.” May insisted. “I know you want to quit S.H.I.E.L.D at the moment. And if you do I won’t stop you. But I don’t want you to rush into it. I want you to take some time to make sure you’re _certain_ about this.”

“Use the money and the passport, fly somewhere. Go somewhere you’ve always wanted to go. Get to know yourself. Because even though you want to go back to your old life. _You can’t_. You’re a new person now and you need to get to know that person. You don’t want to bottle it up. It will only make you weak.”

Skye bit her trembling lip. “Why are you doing this?”

“I know how it feels. Thankfully…” she smiled a little “I had someone to talk me down.”

“I can’t take your money.” Skye said trying to sound firm.

May didn’t acknowledge that, she just took a burner out of her bag and handed her it. “Either use the money and the passport to start a new life or use the phone and you can come home. Either way, be safe Skye.”

Skye nodded and got out of the car hesitantly closing the door behind her unsure whether she would ever see the surprisingly compassionate warrior again.


End file.
